hrmmmm

Its pretty awesome when for the past three days all you've been able to do is sleep - then suddenly at 2 a.m....you are wide awake...boo.

Nutcracker

I have seen several Nutcrackers over the past few days - granted most of them have been on t.v. - only 1 live. But I must ask, what is so wrong with the original story - Clara gets a Nutcracker, she goes to sleep with it - she then dreams (or does she!?!?!) that a clan of evil mice attack her and her nutcracker comes alive, the then hits the mouseking with her shoe, mouseking dies, Nutcracker is transformed back into a human, and then she flies off to a magical land of sweets with her beloved Nutcracker Prince? Why do we have Arabs with scimitars abducting Clara or creep stuffed animal Nutcrackers and mouse queens avenged their dead mouse king husbands or bears rolling around the stage or setting in a circus or cross dressing snowflakes? Can't we just have a simple Christmas story with pretty dancing and TONS of glitter? I mean - that IS why most people go to see it, right? The glitter?

This year

This year I:

Played Tzeitel

Played Iolanthe

Was called striking and statuesque with excellent vocal skills by a prominent casting director

Sang solos in 3 concerts.

Directed a one act for a new theatre company

was a finalist at RADA

Traveled to Sanibel, London, Stratford, DC, Palm Beach, NYC

Talked to Boydy

Talked to Trevor

Met Sierra

Emailed with Trouters

Met some of the most incredible inspirational kind helpful people on the planet

Read some incredible Books (most notably Oryx and Crake and Branagh's autobiography)

Ran/was head of press for a full scale production

Taught Dance classes for adults

Got two pilates certifications which I plan to use in the New Year

Worked as an AFTRA actor on five different t.v. shows.

Lived with four different people. (The current one is AWESOME and I am SO THANKFUL she is here)

Learned how to use a curling iron and hair straightener.

Improved a lot at dance and singing.

Waited patiently at auditions.

Went to some great museums.

Saw some incredible movies - I've truly appreciated film before.

Baked successful pumpkin souffles.

Wrote a lot of transcripts.

Swam really close to a dolphin!

Seen my friends on stage doing remarkable feats of singing/dance/acting.

Got to experience the iPhone 4

And most importantly - got to wear A LOT of GLITTER!:)

2010

It's nearing the end of the year - which leads to a time of bizarre reflection...

I was looking back to my January entries where I made a list of goals and realized - I didn't really do a good job meeting any of them. But that's not necessarily a bad thing. I accomplished a lot of things I would have never thought to even write down as goals - and made some pretty crazy discoveries.

Here were my goals:

for 2010 - I want to book a theatre job! Just book it!

O.k. so I didn't book a "job" - but I did book two amazing roles with VLOG that gave me an opportunity to learn and build my resume. I learned what it was like to lead a show, to sing alone with an orchestra - to harmonize - to follow a conductor - and to hold my own with music/theatre majors and that I can. It was much needed "grad school" as Mary says - and I feel so lucky to have had the experiences.

I want to be in the best physical condition of my life thus far.

Oops. Didn't get there. But I did learn a lot about healthy eating versus crazy calorie counting and fad dieting.

I want to acutally make the things I say I want to do come to fruition (youtube video about evil ballet shoe anyone? Showcase for agents?)

Hrmmm - again nope - unless you count my Gossip Girl youtube video. But I DID sing in no less than three concerts and again was in two shows where I did my darndest to get agents to come. I don't think the likelyhood of them coming to a showcase I put together would have been any more likely. I also did a workshop with the agent who casts most of the shows I want to be in and got personal feedback from him. (Striking and statuesque!) So - I wouldnt say that goal wasn't accomplished - but rather accomplished in a different form than I originally imagined. Now - the evil ballet shoe video still needs to come to fruition.

I want to meet my boyfriend.

Er....no.

I want to be more relaxed about "going with the flow" of things

I would say I achieved this. Esp. with Iolanthe. Through Iolanthe I learned that sometimes not getting what you want is really what you want. Also - I learned so much about being relaxed and being o.k. with "messing up" from the other singers in Iolanthe. Our darling Strephon cracked twice on stage - and lived to tell the tale. He was completely unphased and just kept going - that was amazing! I would have been devastated. I'll always be weirdly high strung and emotional - but I think I'm beginning (BEGINNING) to go with the flow a little more and understand sometimes there is an even better plan than the one I laid out for myself.

I want to explore - actually visit the people I say I'm gonna visit - and experience the world more fully. (Evan, Mo...)

-Nope - but I DID go to England - which was amazing! And I DID try and experience New York more fully - going to the museums - taking advantage of free concerts, boat rides, festivals, etc... and being a tourist in my own city. So no I didn't go to Boston - but I DID go to DC TWICE - and definitely experienced my CITY more fully!

I want to read more.

-I joined the book club with Reinking and discovered some INCREDIBLE book! ESPECIALLY - Oryx and Crake!

I want to see more live shows.

-Thanks to some wonderful friends who work at the Met and the Public Theatre - I did see more live shows - FOR FREE! It was incredible! A fabulous year of live theatre! (PLUS all the theatre I saw in London!:))

I want to keep the apartment beautiful - like an adult.

-Oy - the apt! At least now Candace is here - which is WONDERFUL!

I want to become financially independent - (BOOK IT THEATRE JOBS! BOOK IT!)

-Er - no - BUT I did discover two new ways of supplementing income - writing transcripts for Fabrizio - and EXTRA WORK - which has been a really wild wonderful interesting stressful crazy ecclectic experience! I'm hoping for more!:)

I want to be a good friend to those I know and care about, and family member to my family.'

-I think they are a better judge of this than me.

I want to love everything I do, always look on the bright side of life, and search for the ridiculous in everything for I will surely find it.

-Hrmmmmm,,,,,Still working on this one.

It's been a weird year....but I would say - overall - mostly a good one!:)

looking forward to 2011

Now the real entry...

Today I went to Reinking's apt...for a "book club" meeting. We need to pick a new book. We decided on Cloud Atlas which sounds supremely weird to me - but I picked Dorian Grey last time and it was so darned heady an boring no one could get through it. So - Cloud Atlas it is.

Then everyone asked what eachother was up to. Reinking casually said - "Oh I got a show." Everyone: "Oh! What show?" Reinking: (Show I"m not allowed to type because it's still secret.) "It's a limited run Broadway show." Everyone: "Oh wow! Congratulations! Why didn't you tell us!?" My inner monologue: "Dammit! Why can't I even get a stupid piddly regional show. Why can't I even AUDITION for a piddly regional show that is actually CASTING? GAH! this sucks."

Another girl asks: "what about boys." Everyone pipes in their boy stories. I stay silent. What am I supposed to say? er....this year - I've been on a date with TWO different pirates this year, guy who left to make out with another girl on the porch, and a boy who stood me up at the opera? And propositioned by a boy with a girlfriend, an obese 70 year old creepy conductor, a "knight" from the Renaissance festival Running Wilde shoot, and a trashed real estate agent? Yay, boys are awesome?

But this year is going to be better. This year I am going to get an awesome paying theatre job. I have to. I can sing! I can dance! I can act! Often all at the same time! I work super hard and have gotten so much better at picking up choreography and dance styles quickly! I actually GO to auditions (unlike --- oddly - most of my friends...hence the need for an audition buddy.) It's gonna happen. It's my time! It's now! I feel it in my bones! I am ready willing (eager even!) and able! Even Reinking, who is quick to cut me down, when I said something about how she was a more "trained" singer than I am - said "I wouldn't say that." And I've been taking very scary jazz classes with scary teachers (ACTUALLY scary teachers who kick people out and move them to the back) and they move me towards the front and actually give me the time of day! And Nancy my ballet teacher said I've made extraordinary strides forward. And I'm actually having fun and being relaxed in auditions! I know I'm ready! It's my time!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

And I'm gonna move in March. I have to. Be it with Cara and Kat - or Emily - or Brian or heck - I just get a place by myself - or get a place then craigslist or something - and it will be a beautiful wonderful happy healthy home where I feel comfortable and peaceful and can sleeeeeeeeeep when I want to sleep - not when the neighbors allow me. And it will be amazing!

I'm very excited for what 2011 will contain! I hope it is full of success happiness and prosperity of all kinds!

BROWNIES! EVERYWHERE!

I got my hair cut again today. I didn't mean to - I just meant to get a bang trim, but I was so unhappy with the way my last haircut turned out, I decided to try a new hairstylist - kinda. My hair colorist switched salons so she can now CUT hair too - so I went to her for the bang trim - and we decided my hair was in disgusting shape and needed surgery right away! (The last time it wasn't actually CUT - just thinned or something - all of the ends were dead and gross and split and it all just hung in one super long lump of grossness.) So - the new cutter/oldcolorist -worked MAGIC on it - and it is now healthy and happy and moves and I am just thrilled and feel extremely pretty despite the mass quantities of brownies I ate courtesy of Reinking. (She's trying to fatten me up!)

I have completed my newest 12 Days of Christmas Parody youtube video - a GOSSIP GIRL version. it's horrible - because Candace only had time to record it once - and Kat and I had originally decided to sing it at a duet - but Kat decided she just wasn't warmed up enough or something so I sang it solo - and in the middle (on number 9 actually) Kat made me laugh - so the entire number 9 is me fighting to no crack up. We also NEVER ran through it or rehearsed - so there are some interesting notes - but hey - no one is credited - no one has to know it's me - and it's funny and fun! Even if it's directly production - I like to experiment with various creative outlets.

Also met with Director of Iolanthe to discuss possibly living together! EEEE! PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE! That would be SO RIDICULOUSLY LOVELY! I hope we can make it work!

Fat?

I would like to take a moment to discuss Jennie, a beautiful gorgeous woman I take ballet class with. Jennie is a principle dancer with NYCB and recently danced the role of the Sugar Plum Fairy in their Nutcracker. The NYTimes critic commented that she had eaten "one sugar plum too many" and that her partner looked as though he had sampled every sweet in the kingdom. There was huge public outcry that critics shouldn't comment on a dancer's weight - and it might lead to eating disorders, esp. since Jennie has been very open about over coming anorexia herself. People point toward the new movie the Black Swan where Natalie Portman lost 20 pounds to "accurately portray the role," and one newspaper commented that Jennie is the thicker version of Natalie Portman in the movie.

To begin with - The Black Swan is in NO WAY an accurate portrayal of what ballet is like. To begin with - the second scene when the choreographer enters during a ballet class and starts talking about the plot of Swan Lake - that would NEVER happen. Choreographers don't come in and announce their artistic ideas during a technique class. But more to the point (haha - no pun intended), I know of ONE ballet dancer currently suffering from anorexia and about 20 musical theatre dancers who do. The ballet dancers I know are the most kind supportive wonderful down to earth and intelligent people - it's the musical theatre who are the crazies. And I have NEVER had a teacher or HEARD of a ballet teacher who ACTUALLY told a student to lose weight or stop eating. I'm sure it happens, but it is not the norm, it is the exception. Black Swan - stop putting inaccurate thoughts into people's heads! People - Black Swan is a FICTIONAL MOVIE - in NO WAY based on real events or people. AND - Natalie Portman is smaller than most people people (including young children) on the planet when she's HEALTHY - and she can't live like she did to portray AN ANOREXIC CRAZY DANCER in the movie - as soon as it was over she immediately gained the weight and ate carbs again.!

More to the point - and what NO ONE seems to be pointing out - Jennie Ringer and her partner are in NO WAY fat, heavy, plump, thick, "womanly," "curvy," or any other words that would describe anything except SKINNY! I stand across the room from Jennie in ballet class and I can see her abs through her leotard. Today I kept staring at her like a rude person, and was amazed I could also she the front of her hip bones pointing out through her SWEAT PANTS. I'm not sure I can live in a world where that is considered "plump" by a critic of an established newspaper. All of this media attention is asking does ballet put too much pressure on it's dancers to be skinny. The NYCB thinks Jennie is just fine - it's the same paper that tries to stop anorexia that is projecting a completely unrealistic image onto real life dancers. Natalie Portman's character is not real - and Natalie's bones are tinier than twigs! Jennie Ringer IS SKINNY! VERY VERY VERY VERY VERY skinny! I'm sure some anorexics use her for "thinspiration." I don't know what to do to change the world - but we have gotten a very sick idea of a what "skinny" is if it isn't Jennie. And if Jennie isn't skinny - I need to go on the biggest looser ASAP! And the Biggest Loser contestants should just be shipped off somewhere since they obviously don't deserve to be in this society where Jennie is an unacceptable Sugar Plum. I know - I would be THRILLED to be as skinny as her, and it worries me NO ONE else seems to have pointed this out. The simple fact - she is skinny and her partner is ripped and muscley. He is basically an anatomy book in white tights.

I also met a girl at an audition who claimed to be a size 14 - 5'9 size 14 - but beautifully porportioned. (She looked smaller than a 14 to me to be honest.) She was telling me that she does plus sized modelling and anything size 8 or higher is considered plus size - no matter what your height. OMG - that is sick! Size 8? Plus size? Why can't our society get a grip? I mean - granted - I sit around and complain about "how fat" I am - and why Tyler was sitting on the sofa in his underwear - fat - whereas with JP it was somehow o.k. because he was fit. But that being said - JP is fit - and Tyler was fat - but size 8 is NOT plus size (size 8 is one size bigger than me!) and Jennie Ringer is ballerina thin. As a society - we need a reality check ASAP!

telephone

PS - I can't wait until my phone rings - and it's a JOB! EEE! I'm so excited just thinking about it! THIS is going to be the year! I can feel it! (NOW KNOCK ON A LOT OF WOOD!:))

baby it's cold outside.

What a crazy week so far! It's only Tuesday and I'm about to collapse from exhaustion!

Got 80% of my x-mas shopping done. My brother is proving to be problematic.

Tyler is gone tomorrow! He's been freaking out all day because Candace moved her stuff IN. He's known she was going to move her stuff in on this day for two weeks. He even said "If I can get out of the month early, she can bring her stuff in as soon as she wants." So - here he is - asking me to get out of a month's lease, with the knowledge that Candace would be moving her stuff in today - the day before he moves out. At midnight last night - he started freaking out about how she couldn't move her stuff in - especially not her bed! (He has this WEIRD aversion to beds. I am SO confused. I guess it could be a bed bug thing??? But he was freaking out it.) He wouldn't let her put ANY of her stuff in his/her room - so most of it is currently in my room until tomorrow. I am SO confused why he decided to flip at the last minute. It's one freaking night. I cleaned his poop off the toilet - and took out six bags of trash he had left sitting on the chairs in the living room - he can deal with Candace's suitcases.

It's freaking cold outside. I spend 8 a.m. - 1 p.m. running between audition buildings. (I WAS SEEN FOR AN AUDITION! WOOOHOOOO!) Sure am glad I warmed up my voice this morning! (I thought the singing audition was hopeless - but did it just in case) - and got to practice yesterday.

The afternoon was spent moving Candace's things.

And the night was spent watching my friend's cabaret and eating a sinful Italian dinner with cabaret friend and another friend -all from FIDDLER. It was delicious.

Now I need to sleep. Dentist tomorrow. Joy.

Acting Class

I decided to brave an acting class today - HIGHLY recommended by a very reliable friend named Alena. I've had bad experiences with acting classes past - but was told this is the best class in the WORLD! Wow! In the WORLD!? I have got to try this! AAAAAND - it's only $30! WoWzA!

Well - I get there and the teacher is an uncannily peppy skinny flaming gay man who has chosen a room wedged between two opera singers practicing the dolls song from Les Contes D'Hoffman - Les Ouiseaux dans la Charmille" - why BOTH opera singers were practicing this is beyond me - it is a ridiculously difficult UBER high soprano aria (Actually it has "optional" notes that are high than I can sing - and actually higher than THESE girls could sing as the other acting student continually pointed out - but I'm proud to say our Phyllis in IOLANTHE can easily sing!) and a hip hop class BLASTING their hip hop music - which made for an extremely strange atmosphere to begin with.

The teacher handed us all "sides" to read - and he looked at me and said I have a GREAT side for you - and handed me something from THE WEST WING - where the character I was to read wasn't taken seriously in Washington because she used to play Snow White at Epcot Center. Wow. This guy must be psyhic I thought! So far - GREAT start! There is hope. He gives us 20 minutes to "memorize" the scene. (We'll get back to memorizing - but I actually memorize my scene - because I was told to.)

So he stands up and starts talking about how we have to stop doubting ourself and behave as though the scene were really happening - and quoting all of these famous actors who say that acting is easy and just getting rid of all the masks we put on to create a scene the way we think it should be done - instead of just experiencing it first hand. And how we need to say these affirmations like - it's o.k. to totally suck and forget all the lines - as long as we are HONEST!

So he asks the first girl to go up and he starts reading her scene with her - now there is no doubt he is a fabulous actor - I was unaware he was even reading lines at first. BUt he told the girl reading that she was making "too many choices" and not allowing the words to be organic - and worrying too much about remembering the line - so he just starts talking to her about random stuff - then starts the scene. I'm actually not sure it made her better. Then the next person comes up - pretty much the same exact thing. Pretty much the same until one girl got up and he started telling her she was too nice - and she had to think of something traumatizing in her - and she couldnt think of anything traumatizing - and he told her she would never get anywhere if she was nice - and no one would want to sit with her at the lunch table because she was too eager to please everyone. (WHAT? What lunch table!?) And she started to cry and then he said - your times up - sit down! Wow - harsh... Next few people got up - it was very similar to the first.

Then my turn came. And apparently I was making too many choices and putting on a character of how I think a girl who used to be a Disney Princess would act like. (Ummmmm? Really? ) and then started to ask me about my traumatizing past and how my parents obviously abused me or I'm still haunted by mean middle school teachers or what a kid told me in elementary school - and I was like - ummmm - no - I'm o.k. with all that stuff - so then he asked me to describe the stupidest thing a teacher ever made me do - and said "read Beloved" which made everyone laugh - and he said I was now "trying to entertain the class and to stop" - so I started mumbling and made something up about my tormented past which he said was better and more honest - he then told me while it was very impressive I was word perfect - I should have paraphrased more. WHAT? Why would I paraphrase when I memorized the words? He -then said we were out of time - and I said "But I don't understand..." and he said - "we're out of time read my book."

WHAT? Read his BOOK? I was only doing good acting the one time I was lying about my troubled past which wasn't troubled? This is so messed up! I mean - YES - I obviously WAS acting then - but he point was that I wasn't acting and finally telling the truth. DUDE! What is WRONG WITH YOU!? And WHY do I have to have a messed up past to be able to act. And why must this messed up past come from my parents or elementary/middle school? The most messed up parts of my life were two years ago...and if you want me to cry - you best talk about my dog. '

And by the way - girls who want to be Disney princesses - act like me - unless of course - you mean the ones who are dependent on finding their prince for happiness. But even them - I think they just want a man - not to specifically be a Disney Princess.

GAH! MARY COME BACK! I MISS YOU SO MUCH!

DISNEY DON'T CRUSH MY DREAMS!

ALRIGHT DISNEY! I don't know WHAT you're playing at here! But to stop making FAIRY TALES! WHAT!? THIS must be a sign of the apocalypse!

I know you want to appeal to boys - but you need to appeal to GIRLS too! I mean - I have ZERO interest in seeing CARS2. I haven't seen Toy Story 2 or 3 and really didn't enjoy Toy Story 1. I didn't even buy that silly you got a friend song...

I know you think that the box office failure of the Princess and the Frog is a sign that no one wants to see Princess Stories - but did you ever stop and think - THATS BECAUSE THE FILM WAS SUBPAR? I mean - honestly, all of the advances in animation sing Disney introduced Oswald Rabbit were completely ignored! The character lacked physical weight and gravity, the character were stereotypical (really? I black girl whose goal in life is to make GUMBO?), the plot was odd, and the girl only got her "dream" (to make gumbo) AFTER she decided to give it up and be with her man. Oh yeah --- and I can't find a SINGLE PERSON who can hum me ONE line from ANY of the songs in the entire movie. Isn't that what Disney does? Gives you a musical hook? I was actually sad I spent money on it. BUT TANGLED! You were back on your GAME in TANGLED! Everything about it was simply BRILLIANT - even though I had to wear to those silly 3-D glasses. And notice - the box office numbers are actually RISING - because people go to see it and say - WOW! That movie was INCREDIBLE! Let me tell my friends! Beautiful ground breaking animation, relatable multidimensional character, hysterical "gags," (of which good old Walt would have been exceedingly proud!), beautiful music, great plot! I mean - make films like THAT - people will COME! Make films like Princess and the Frog - they won't.

Oh - and for everyone who says Princesses teach girls to be superficial and depend on boys...I would just like to say - I want to be a Disney Princess - but my long suffering mum has to basically fight to get me to wear cloths that look nice over being "comfortable" and I CERTAINLY don't depend on my "prince" to bring me happiness - and I am perfectly career oriented - and have not given it up to seek my prince - or do my hair...the princesses are all the odd-balls who are kind and generous and work really hard to get their dreams! O.k. their dreams might be to GET a prince - but let's give girls a little credit - and assume they can use the prince as an allegory for whatever they want. And to know they will undergo trials and tribulations but if they handle them with grace and poise and courage - they will get a glittery fairytale ending!

And if nothing else - give a wonderful beautiful place to ESCAPE to - not like BLACK SWAN which presetn this bizarre horrific world of self mutilation and sexual molestation - I don't want to pay to see someone's evil mirror twin ruing their life. I want to see that goals can be achieved without going absolutely psycho and stabbing myself with a giant piece of glass from a smashed mirror and imagining scary lesbian sex with my arch nemesis. I want to see a girl who has guts and courage and drive and dignity and smarts and isn't afraid of glitter!

DISNEY DON'T TAKE THIS AWAY FROM ME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

That being said - in an attempt to reach my career goals - I had a very frustrating morning running from audition to audition and not getting seen...BOOOOOO SINGER CALLS! But then one of my dance teacher put on his facebook that he was running the dance call for a regional theatre, so - I realized I had my leotard from yesterday in my bag, and hopped on over to be very smelly at a dance call. I actually had FUN at the audition - probably the first time in my life I had fun at an audition. I was just being silly - he said to find out "inner man" for the first half then ballerina princess for the second half - and I dug right down to the bottom of my soul to find my inner man - and boy did I find it - I even have lovely purple bruises on my thighs from it - and then could just show off for the Princessy Ballet part - oh look! You want me to SLOOOOOOWLY extend my leg in the air while doing pretty mermaid arms! Alright - if I must. Then - the director asked who sang - and all the girls got really timid and I LEPT up and said I REALLLLLLLLY sing! And the choreographer/my dance teacher vouched for it and said I was soprano and asked me what my top note was - and I gleefully said an E above High C. He started laughing because I was apparently being WAY too enthusiastic (BUT HEY - THEY weren't HEARING us sing - I figured if anything my confidence would be my backer!) Sadly - I don't think they are actually hiring non-equity. The theatre homepage has EQUITY ONLY all over it - and they hire noneq locally on a show by show basis - and they didn't even hear us sing! No one is going to cast anyone without hearing them sing. And the director gave us a very solemn speech about how we need to not be afraid to go to singer calls because that's where he casts - (At which point I nearly beat him up ! IF YOU WANT ME TO SING I WILL SING! SOMEONE ONLY MADE THEIR SINGER CALL AN HOUR AND A HALF SO GUESS WHO DIDNT GET TO SING! ILL SING NOW! I DONT EVEN NEED AN ACCOMPANIST! JUST LET ME DO IT!) - and then he started talking about how most us probably don't audition for directors - and I was just confused. But at least the choreographer knows I can sing - so well - who knows. It was super fun! A good warm up for the audition season to come!

(not so) Mature Ways to Deal with your crappy roommate

After locking myself in my room and crying after I got up to go to the bathroom - only to return and find all my stuff moved - the sofa completley taken over - the t.v. blasting (I had been watching Gossip Girl on my computer - which was on the table in front on the sofa - I didn't get to see it last night because I was at the opera) and a naked roommate with a Homer Simpson physique chowing down a box of donuts - I decided I should practice some really hard opera arias I have yet to learn. For the first time since he tornado-ed the place (I've completely given up attempting to clean - I now know how my long suffering mum feels during my trips home) he got uneasy and finally asked "Audition." And I said -no just need to practice - it never hurts to learn an aria - these are especially hard and I don't know them yet. I believe my point was made. Next time - I'm gonna go into the living and insist on using the key board to work on the particularly difficult "half steps" and high Ds. Want to make sure I'm not going flat you know.

Also - since he has a plan to not get off the sofa for the next two days --- I asked to do extra work shifts so I'm out of the apt., endear myself to my bosses, and don't commit homicide. Of course coming home to a drain full of ramen noodles and carrots and a toilet covered in piss - well - I've yet to figure out a not so mature way of dealing with that. I've actually SPOKEN to him about it - but alas --- I guess he likes his pee - white toilets are SOOOOO faux-pas.

trash

I can't wait for Tyler to move out - even if it F-s me over financially - eating Ramen is probably better than my desire to use my battle axe every single moment I'm home....

BTW - you cant sit on any of the chairs in the living room because they LITERALLY have trash bags on all of them. WTF? I am messy - VERY messy - but this is just gross and ridiculous. I dread being home - and think I was dying of trash fumes while practicing my voice today. BOOOO friends who recommended him. NOT a win.

What IS a win is Deborah Voigt's voice! Swooooon!

Music

I love music so much. Not the crappy stuff my neighborhood thinks is music - but REAL music that conveys a true emotion - a truth - a story. Normally I reserve "real" music the classical realm - opera and classical music and classical musical theatre - but every now and then you find a contemporary artist who makes glorious music as well. She's been on the scene for ten years - but I just discovered Mandy Moore. Of course - it was Disney that brought me to her. She is the voice of RAPUNZEL in the newest animated featured film TANGLED. (RACE to the theatre to see it now, it's glorious! She may have usurped Jasmine as my second favorite princess!) The vocal nuances she brings to the songs in TANGLED are unlike any I have heard before. Complete vocal freedom - so expressive and haunting and exuberant! So I downloaded some of her actual music - and it is equally as amazing! She is sort of like a modern peppier Joni Mitchell. Needless to say - I have found my "pop" singer whose music I want to work on! There is so much to learn from her! I'm very excited to embark on my first WILLING pop vocal adventure.

And - inspired by Mandy Moore - I have decided I need to make a demo c.d. and send it to EVERY power that be at Disney - so I can be a Disney Princess. Or at least - the sidekick raccoon or something! lol.

THE MASTER CLASS is coming to Broadway - they want actress who can sing in the operatic repertoire. I submitted - I doubt I'll get an audition since they said "equity only." I just didn't tell them I'm not equity - just submitted. We'll see. If I get an audition - I'll have to sing this ridiculously hard sounding Bel Canto aria from Lucia de Lammermoor. Candace promises she can help. (WHY IS MARY IN ITALY! COME BACK!)

I just wish I sit around and study music all day! There is SO much to learn! A friend today told me about a free on-line course in ear training - which I will have to do - since - I am really weak at that. Apparently to do Church gigs and the like (Which PAY) you need to be able to sight read and harmonize - I can't sightread and am really poor at harmonizing - but ear training helps with that - and Candace helps with that - so HOPEFULLY! We shall see what happens

I just love MUSIC!:)

Theodore Roosevelt

Yesterday, I went to Barnes and Noble to look for a new book to read on the subway. Sadly, my most frequented Barnes and Nobles will be turned into a Century 21 in the New year (think low class Loehmann's...) so they have ceased to restock. The book I was seeking was not there, so Kat and I wandered around looking at other books. I actually got a BASKET because all the books were discounted and I was getting classics fro $2-$4 - I couldn't help it! As I reached the check out with about 7 books totalling $16...I passed a display that had a HUGE gorgeous Franco Zefferelli opera/screen table book on it. (Zefferelli directed MY favorite movie version of Romeo and Juliet.) So I opened it and drooled and put it back as it was not $2. Then just below I noticed "COLONEL ROOSEVELT" by Edmund Morris with two stickers on it - "30% off" and "Autographed copy." I started totally freaking out and Kat thought I had been possessed by some crazy book demon. I couldn't explain why this was so monumental.

Back in my summer of dreams in Stratford - JLF told me to read two behemoth books about Theodore Roosevelt - "The Rise of Theodore Roosevelt" and "Theodore Rex." He told me they were part of a triology, but the author, Edmund Morris, has stopped writing it for another writing pursuit(s) - one of which was the extremely controversial "Dutch," about Ronald Reagan. So I painstakingly read the first two, and periodically checked for the third book to come out - but soon lost hope (and perhaps interest) and totally forgot about it. Until - yesterday - at B&N. It turns out it came out November 23rd, and I apparently missed the author signing copies. That being said - I GOT an autographed copy, e-mailed JLF to tell him, and am currently reading about Teddy's post-presidential pursuits in Africa. Wooohoo!

And no one understands --- why I care...