Today I went to Reinking's apt...for a "book club" meeting. We need to pick a new book. We decided on Cloud Atlas which sounds supremely weird to me - but I picked Dorian Grey last time and it was so darned heady an boring no one could get through it. So - Cloud Atlas it is.
Then everyone asked what eachother was up to. Reinking casually said - "Oh I got a show." Everyone: "Oh! What show?" Reinking: (Show I"m not allowed to type because it's still secret.) "It's a limited run Broadway show." Everyone: "Oh wow! Congratulations! Why didn't you tell us!?" My inner monologue: "Dammit! Why can't I even get a stupid piddly regional show. Why can't I even AUDITION for a piddly regional show that is actually CASTING? GAH! this sucks."
Another girl asks: "what about boys." Everyone pipes in their boy stories. I stay silent. What am I supposed to say? er....this year - I've been on a date with TWO different pirates this year, guy who left to make out with another girl on the porch, and a boy who stood me up at the opera? And propositioned by a boy with a girlfriend, an obese 70 year old creepy conductor, a "knight" from the Renaissance festival Running Wilde shoot, and a trashed real estate agent? Yay, boys are awesome?
But this year is going to be better. This year I am going to get an awesome paying theatre job. I have to. I can sing! I can dance! I can act! Often all at the same time! I work super hard and have gotten so much better at picking up choreography and dance styles quickly! I actually GO to auditions (unlike --- oddly - most of my friends...hence the need for an audition buddy.) It's gonna happen. It's my time! It's now! I feel it in my bones! I am ready willing (eager even!) and able! Even Reinking, who is quick to cut me down, when I said something about how she was a more "trained" singer than I am - said "I wouldn't say that." And I've been taking very scary jazz classes with scary teachers (ACTUALLY scary teachers who kick people out and move them to the back) and they move me towards the front and actually give me the time of day! And Nancy my ballet teacher said I've made extraordinary strides forward. And I'm actually having fun and being relaxed in auditions! I know I'm ready! It's my time!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
And I'm gonna move in March. I have to. Be it with Cara and Kat - or Emily - or Brian or heck - I just get a place by myself - or get a place then craigslist or something - and it will be a beautiful wonderful happy healthy home where I feel comfortable and peaceful and can sleeeeeeeeeep when I want to sleep - not when the neighbors allow me. And it will be amazing!
I'm very excited for what 2011 will contain! I hope it is full of success happiness and prosperity of all kinds!
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