I had to be at the audition center by 8:30 a.m. I was in such a hurry (and out of practice) I managed to FORGET MY DRESS! AND my dance tights! I had my leotard, dance shoes, dress shoes, but no dress or tights! Loralee TRIED to bring me my tights, but I ended up auditioning before she could. FORTUNATELY - GOSSIP GIRL was on last night so I was feeling especially Blair-like - and was rather dressed up for my "street cloths." The last audition I did since booking MFL was a disaster! AND - the MFL dressing room messes with my brain in a not so amazing way. It's very odd and weirdly competitive - negative - strange. So I was seriously doubting myself. PLUS - I was auditioning for a director I used to A.D. - which made me realllllllly nervous - you know - having to prove to her I belonged on THIS side of the table. I was very nervous - and I forgot my dress. A girl in my cast was there - and she came up to me and said - "all they (audition panel) want to do is talk to eachother - so make sure you get their attention before you start.) Ah - I think this implied she did not get the reaction she wanted. I"m not sure if she was trying to psyche me out - or help me. That being said - it gave me a challenge. I LIKE challenges. I put on I AM THE WIFE OF MAO TSE-TEUNG on my headphones right up until the moment I went in the room - so I couldn't hear ANYONE else or anything else. I went to China and became a CRAZY PSYCHO CHINESE DICTATOR! It' s a weird battle cry - I know - but it helps me remember that I am ME - I am enough just as I am - I am the wife of mao tse-teung and when I appear the people hang upon my words! You WILL listen to me and I will be awesome! It helps me focus and get in the zone and be battle ready. Sometimes it works better than others - auditioning - for me - it a battle within my brain - I am my own worst enemy - I can psyche myself out by worrying about others - or just focus on myself. When I do the latter - the results are usually good - when the former - not so much. Today - fortunately - the result was good. i went in the room and sang my song probably better than I ever have! I was so pleased and had SO much fun in the room. The director commented on my "sassy legs." And the accompanist is actually the accompanist for Mary's workshops - and she gave me a HUGE thumbs up when I finished and when I talked to him later said I sounded really great. That made me SO happy! It gave me MUCH needed confidence. They asked me to dance - and then I read the breakdown and they said to bring TAP SHOES! ACK! GAH! SO I had to run home and get my tap shoes! And then - when the call started - the combination was MERCIFULLY ballet and I didn't need to tap shoes. (AND - I got my tights from Loralee.) They asked me and a girl on the tour of Wicked to come back and tap on Friday - shudder - TAP!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! TAPTAPTAP! I couldn't escape it! But - I've been whining that I feel out of shape and not challenged - now I have a HUGE challenge. Gotta fake it until I make it - and wake up early next two days to take tap before going to my matinees of MFL! And I am just so exceedingly happy I got over my weird confidence demons to audition to the best of my ability today - even WITHOUT my dress!:) And I'm glad to be grouped in with a girl on the WICKED tour. The casting director told us he just love us both so much and would love to have us tap. (He might not love me so much after this - I've been BAD about tap. I've actually WORKED a LITTLE on belting - and can do a fake mixed belt - but tap - shudder - anything outside of the seagull tap dance will be exciting to say the least.) It would be an amazing job to have - but we will see. If I lose out on it because of tap - it mean A) I should actually take TAP - and B- it's understandable. I'd be sad if I was cut on ballet. Something I'm SUPPOSED to be good at.
Well - we don't know what the future holds. I was just glad to put in a good strong showing!:) Judges will score how they will - I'm competing against myself!:) And today - in my opinion - I won!:) (Knock on wood for this ENTIRE entry!)
Then I GOT TO HANG OUT WITH BILL! Bill Loralee and I went to see LION KING in 3-D (my first time seeing it on the big screen) - then I got a slice of pizza they each got a slice of cake/pie. We laughed and had a wonderful jolly good time! It was MUCH needed and refreshed me for the incredibly challenging exciting fun week ahead! Hopefully I'll be victorious!:)
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