We are number 1 - all others are number 2 or lower

This was a very trying week. Lots of auditions that threw lots of very frustrating curve balls. (I.e. - going in to audition for FIDDLER and being given the choreography to A CHORUS LINE. Here's the thing with A Chorus Line. There are girls who LIVE for a Chorus Line -and every production of A Chorus Line has the same choreography and the same exact audition combination. There are many workshops to perfect this combination. Girl who LIVE for Chorus Line train this combination constantly. I do not. So - I really have no shot at all of going in for this musical. FIDDLER however - I do.) (I.e. #2 - two accompanists who could not play my music. Or more precisely one who COULD not - and one who WOULD not. The one who WOULD not - decided he didn't like the arrangement of my music, didn't play the measures he disagreed with, took my music OUT of my binder - wrote on it IN PEN - notes that HE liked - and said "people have been messing this up for years." Then sent me on my way. Um - EXCUSE ME - it's NOT your job the approve or disapprove of my music - and certainly to just NOT PLAY measures you don't like DURING my audition. If anything, do the rearranging BEFORE and WARN ME. GRRRRRRRRRRR!) And lots of very early mornings waiting out on sidewalks for two hours before buildings opened. (To be met with accompanist who just don't want to play my music apparently.) And very few words of encouragement from the "other side of the table." very few signs they are even hiring. Or looking. Or considering. Insecurities run rampant inside my brain! Super fun all around. I'd really like some good news on the professional front about now. Hello? Anyone there? PLEASE?

On the other hand - I've seen a lot of really great free or incredibly cheap theatre in the most unexpected placed. Friends who do equity showcases (which I get in for free with my card!) that are actually really good! It makes me proud to be their friend and happy to see great "fringe" theatre and new work being done! I've discovered comedy/improv at place like UCB and The Pit and The Magnet where for a mere $5 you get a evening of silliness and fun. AEA sometimes gives out free tickets so I get to see SIERRA tomorrow in an off-Broadway show - which I'm obviously very excited about.

I've also made some new friends who are awesome - and reconnected with some old friends - lots of Woman in White friends coming out of the woodwork which is really nice for me! One got me involved in a charity singing organization. It doesn't pay but it's nice to sing in a pressure free environment for people who just think you are the cat's pajamas!

And I rewatched Mystery Men. Because sometimes you just need to remember that we are number 1 - all others are number 2 or lower. And when you doubt your powers - you give powers to your doubts. And that you must lash out with every limb, like an octopus who plays the drums!:)