The Little Mermaid

So in the middle of Jana's class - I got a text from my from my friend Austin saying "Just so you know, I'm on for the prince tonight and we're closing August 30th."

My reaction was rather unexpected.  I think I was first of all - really excited to see Austin as the prince!  I told Jana "i need to go" and she asked "is everything ok and I said "yes - my friend is just going on as the prince in tlm" - and everyone in the class was like "oooooooooh" (acknowledgement of understanding at my need to go.)  So I ran and got a ticket - and he was brilliant!  I had never heard him sing, and what a voice.  It was very natural sounding - and rich - and deep.  I was beaming the entire time he was onstage and there is a very strong possibility I developed a mini-crush watching him perform.  He added a spunk and sparkle to the prince I had not seen before.  (For the record, I do love the original prince as well - both are superb performers.  The original prince portrays him as world weary with a deep inner sadness of a missing soulmate.  Austin portrays him as an antsy puppy of prince eager to seize the the world but kept (unwillingly) back by his birthright.)

At any rate - I have two reactions to Mermaid closing - both bizarre.  The first is - this is actually great for two reasons - if everyone is scrambling around to find a new job - someone might leave and need a replacement for the last two weeks.  I know the show - Austin knows this - I am TOTALLY there!!!!  Well - it's not that easy - not in the slightest - but - hey - you never know - it is my happy little fantasy.  Secondly -they have announced they will produce a "tour."  Who knows if this will actually come to fruition.  WIW was going to have a tour too - but oh well.  If it does - the entire cast ill be OPEN!  MWHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!

The second reaction was relief.  I was so stressed - so freaking out with pressure I had placed on myself to get in the show.  It all lifted.  I felt somehow bouyant - like - now I can enjoy my vacation - and relax - I had been training so hard - and now - I can breath.  The need to be perfect was gone.

And the training was not for nought.  I learned how to BELT!  I learned how to TAP!  I learned how to train.  I learned so much about myself and about my voice and my movement.  I've improved exponentially in all aspects of my life thanks to Mermaid.  I learned how to do my hair, and make-up, and look nice (to practice for when I was cast as Ariel and had to dress according to the Disney code.)  I sought out Mary who has been a godsend to my voice AND my acting.  Thanks to her, I've developed an ability to perform HONESTLY (as opposed to "acting sad" or "acting happy" etc...) and how to release tension and stress that blocks my voice, dance, and acting.  I forced myself to learn to belt - instead of being comfortable with my "legit" singing.  I pushed myself beyond where I believed my vocal abilities lay.  I've learned my weaknesses in dance and am fixing them.  I've bonded with many dance teachers who have helped me with this, and been very encouraging and supportive.  I forced myself to learn to tap and go to tap class.  I figured out how to make it all work!  Most importantly I gained self confidence in knowing that I truly can do anything I set my mind to.  True - I might never be in the show - but I HAVE brought myself to a level where I COULD - and make others believe this as well!  All of this will surely prove helpful in future - and I can't wait to see what the future holds!:)

Mermaid has given me so much happiness over this past year - and I feel so much good has come from it - I can't resent a single moment I spent in pursuit of this dream.  I am thankful I pursued it!  

Once upon a time I wrote my college essay about what I learned from a song from THE SCARLET PIMPERNEL - "INTO THE FIRE" - to pursue something with all your heart - and remember - the result isn't the most important thing - the most important this is that you went for it with all you had and now have a great story to tell.   I believe my pursuit of Mermaid embodies this - so - from one musical obsession to another - here are the lyrics to INTO THE FIRE!:)

David walked into the valley
With a stone clutched in his hand
He was only a boy
But he knew someone must take a stand

There will always be a valley
Always mountains one must scale
There will always be perilous waters
Which someone must sail

Into valleys, into waters
Into jungles, into hell
Let us ride, let us ride home again with a story to tell
Into darkness, into danger
Into storms that rip the night
Don't give in, but give up
But give thanks for the glorious fight

You can tremble, you can fear it
But keep your fighting spirit alive boys
Let the shiver of it sting you
Fling into battle, spring to your feet boys
Never hold back your step for a moment
Never doubt that your courage will grow
Hold your head even higher and into the fire we go 

Are there mountains that surround us?
Are there walls that block the way?
Knock 'em down, strip 'em back boys
And forward and into the fray

Into terror, into valour
Charge ahead, no, never turn
Yes, it's into the fire we fly
And the devil will burn

Someone has to face the valley
Rush in, we have to rally and win boys
When the world is saying not to
By God, you know you've got to march on, boys
Never hold back your step for a moment
Never doubt that your courage will grow
Hold your head ever higher and into the fire we go 

Let the lightning strike
Let the flash of it shock you
Choke your fears away
Pull as tight as a wire
Let the fever strike
Let the force of it rock you
We will have our day, sailing into the fire

Someone has to face the valley
Rush in! We have to rally and win boys
When the world is saying not to
By God, you know you've got to march on, boys
Never hold back your step for a moment
Look alive! Oh, your courage will grow
Yes, it's higher and higher and into the fire we go
Into fire!
Onward, ho! 

YAY PIMPY!